Survival and Healing and Moving On

I survived the procedure last week. I won’t lie and say it was a breeze. I won’t be flippant and pretend it was actually nothing.

It hurt. A lot. As someone with a high tolerance for pain, it was horrid. I fell in the hospital afterwards as well and refused to accept a wheelchair (so I bruised up my knees again). I was exhausted, sore and hungry. I slept for two days afterwards, waking up only enough to eat. Three days later, I could stay awake long enough to watch a movie but not much more than that. I don’t exactly remember what movie it was, but I have a feeling it was A Christmas Prince.

I’d like to say that I will never do that again (the procedure I mean. I’ve already watched A Christmas Prince like four times since it’s been seasonally released).

But I would.

I don’t know if this will help my doctors figure out what has changed. I have no idea if the data that was needed was able to be collected. But whatever actions I need to take to work towards having fewer seizures, less medication and more reliable mornings, I will take them. And more importantly, I hope any of the information can help others.

I’ve heard and read about “curing epilepsy”. With the intention to cure everyone of all versions of the condition. To eradicate it, gone with tuberculosis, bubonic plague, and smallpox. (Note: I don’t know for sure if these are actually all international extinct but I think they are, so that’s enough for now). So curing epilepsy. I don’t know if that’s possible. The condition stems from different sources (genetics, infections, injuries, surgeries, evil magic) and has different forms of expressions.

As much as I love the idea of the condition being eradicated, I know that I personally don’t need it. I’ve had this condition for twenty years. I would *love* to keep the people who I know who also experience it to be safe. I would *love* not to put my family and friends through the worries and sleepless nights. I would *love* for no one to ever get the diagnoses again. Until that time, I would LOVE to help make the condition a little more bearable. Whether that’s from the data from the medical procedure, the results of my experiences with pharmaceuticals or from this blog, I hope anything I can do can help. If that means going through that procedure or any others, sign me up. No matter how much it may hurt.

Plus then I get to watch A Christmas Prince a couple times a day while I recover.

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